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Author Topic: Making difficult decisions  (Read 7394 times)

Womble

  • Joined Mar 2009
  • Stirlingshire, Central Scotland
Making difficult decisions
« on: August 07, 2017, 09:52:55 pm »
Like many smallholding couples, Mrs Womble and I don't see eye to eye on everything. To give three examples:

  • "Dinky", our kitchen reared tiny tup lamb from last year is still running around the field, and disappointingly still has his b*llocks too. He's clearly never going to make it as a breeding tup, although being small and bouncy, he did manage to jump the fence at Christmas and get our ewe lambs pregnant  >:( . Also, he's now charged at me twice, so I don't dare turn my back on him ever.
     
    I think he should become burgers before autumn hormones make him any worse.  Mrs Womble wants to keep him because he's still cute as hell, and wiggles his tail like a lamb if you rub his chin  :innocent:
     
  • "Bramble" is a 3-shear ewe who has given us great lambs two years running, and has had no problems whatsoever..... until coming down with mastitis a fortnight ago. The vet says she will almost certainly have no milk in future so just get her through the antibiotic withdrawal period and then turn her into mutton.

    I am happy to accept this advice and put her in the freezer. Mrs Womble thinks we should give her another chance next year, and bottle rear her lambs if she has no milk.
     
  • I believe that our land will support about fourteen ewes plus their lambs. We're currently on track to be up at this number by the end of next year, as our home bred lambs join the flock.

    Mrs Womble wants to buy more sheep to replace three old ewes who are going for cull soon. I want to stick with just the ones we've got, because I really don't want our holding to become an overstocked mud-fest in the winter.
I'm a head before heart kind of guy. I like to look at evidence, understand what's going on, and make a practical decision. I also believe that the sheep must work for us, and not us for the sheep, so I want to make decisions which will keep improving our situation into the future (e.g. culling for problem lambers and bad feet).

Mrs Womble, however is all heart. If one sheep is gorgeous and lovely to have around, two sheep must be twice as gorgeous. And no, she doesn't really care if we have surplus tups kicking about, or milkless ewes. Each and every one of our animals is her friend, and she loves them dearly!

This thread isn't about these specific examples though (so please don't discuss them); it's about the principles behind the decision. Do you and your smallholding partner(s) find yourselves in similar situations and unable to agree on the way forward? If so, how do you resolve them?  Actually, *do* you resolve them, or do you just keep kicking the can down the road like we do? ::)

Please share your experience, as I think this thread could end up being quite enlightening!!  :thumbsup:
« Last Edit: August 07, 2017, 09:57:33 pm by Womble »
"All fungi are edible. Some fungi are only edible once." -Terry Pratchett

Rosemary

  • Joined Oct 2007
  • Barry, Angus, Scotland
    • The Accidental Smallholder
Re: Making difficult decisions
« Reply #1 on: August 08, 2017, 09:13:28 am »
I just do as Dan tells me. :innocent:

Womble

  • Joined Mar 2009
  • Stirlingshire, Central Scotland
Re: Making difficult decisions
« Reply #2 on: August 08, 2017, 09:45:53 am »
Sure you do Rosemary, sure you do ;).
"All fungi are edible. Some fungi are only edible once." -Terry Pratchett

Me

  • Joined Feb 2014
  • Wild West
Re: Making difficult decisions
« Reply #3 on: August 08, 2017, 10:11:00 am »
 Do you and your smallholding partner(s) find yourselves in similar situations and unable to agree on the way forward?

No. Mrs Me has seen what happens when you give sheep "a chance" enough times. We have children and consequently a (female) pet sheep that will certainly never leave here so there are exceptions - but we will be punished for it.

Your Wombling wont be very free with a smashed kneecap...

Dan

  • The Accidental Smallholder
  • Administrator
  • Joined Oct 2007
  • Carnoustie, Angus
    • The Accidental Smallholder
    • Facebook
Re: Making difficult decisions
« Reply #4 on: August 08, 2017, 10:12:53 am »
I just do as Dan tells me. :innocent:

Aye, right.  ::)

We usually discuss, compromise, and do what Rosemary wants.  :D

Seriously, I'm all logic so can appreciate your perspective. I find it helps if we have a default position - a baseline agreement about why we're doing this and what role the different enterprises have.

So if something's 'for profit' (in theory), having non-paying passengers, however cute, isn't a runner. But that still leaves room for exceptions if we both agree.
« Last Edit: August 08, 2017, 10:24:14 am by Dan »

Jukes Mum

  • Joined Apr 2014
  • North Yorkshire
Re: Making difficult decisions
« Reply #5 on: August 08, 2017, 10:25:52 am »
Hmm, I'm a bit of both- head and heart. Unfortunately heart usually wins.
In theory, I am happy to move on less productive stock, but in pracice.......
We have a tup who was supposed to be a wether. He is the sweetest boy so won't be going anywhere, but he is a pain in the a*se around tupping time. He will be having a little op soon!
We have registered and unregistered ewes. The aim was to move on all unregisered ones until we had just registered, but can't possible get rid of "Norm"!
The chickens all look the same, so while the plan was to cull them as they started aging and not laying, we don't know who's who so they all stay.
Don’t Monkey With Another Monkey’s Monkey

sabrina

  • Joined Nov 2008
Re: Making difficult decisions
« Reply #6 on: August 08, 2017, 12:52:19 pm »
As I look after the animals and do most of the daily work its more or less left to me when an animal is culled. Having a tup about the place that you don't need is just a waste of ground space. There are times I wish I did not have to decide when the pigs or sheep go but if it was down to my OH we would not have them in the first place. He does enjoy the end product though.

Backinwellies

  • Global Moderator
  • Joined Sep 2012
  • Llandeilo Carmarthenshire
    • Nantygroes
    • Facebook
Re: Making difficult decisions
« Reply #7 on: August 08, 2017, 01:25:18 pm »
Will respond more about partnership decisions later .... But if you haven't already got one ...I solved the ram problem by convert to teaser.... But have to say he doesn't butt.
Linda

Don't wrestle with pigs, they will love it and you will just get all muddy.

Let go of who you are and become who you are meant to be.

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waterbuffalofarmer

  • Joined Apr 2014
  • Mid Wales
  • Owner of 61 Mediterranean water buffaloes
Re: Making difficult decisions
« Reply #8 on: August 08, 2017, 03:57:19 pm »
The solution is staring you right in the face, my head'll be bitten off for this one... Assert your manly authority, tell her that although you do value her opinion you need to think of the good of the animals/livelihood before cute and cuddly. Make the decision, simple as. Mercenary Ik, but sometimes these things have to be done for the good of the future. Ok I'll get me coat! :coat:
« Last Edit: August 08, 2017, 07:16:49 pm by waterbuffalofarmer »
the most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, loving concern.

PK

  • Joined Mar 2015
  • West Suffolk
    • Notes from a Suffolk Smallholding
Re: Making difficult decisions
« Reply #9 on: August 08, 2017, 05:10:23 pm »
Quote
Insert your manly authority,

I take it you meant 'assert'...

in the hills

  • Joined Feb 2012
Re: Making difficult decisions
« Reply #10 on: August 08, 2017, 05:39:16 pm »
Oh, WBF ..... Please edit quickly. :roflanim:


SallyintNorth

  • Joined Feb 2011
  • Cornwall
  • Rarely short of an opinion but I mean well
    • Trelay Cohousing Community
Re: Making difficult decisions
« Reply #11 on: August 08, 2017, 06:15:08 pm »
Oh, WBF ..... Please edit quickly. :roflanim:


No don't, I'm still chuckling  :roflanim: :roflanim:
Don't listen to the money men - they know the price of everything and the value of nothing

Live in a cohousing community with small farm for our own use.  Dairy cows (rearing their own calves for beef), pigs, sheep for meat and fleece, ducks and hens for eggs, veg and fruit growing

SallyintNorth

  • Joined Feb 2011
  • Cornwall
  • Rarely short of an opinion but I mean well
    • Trelay Cohousing Community
Re: Making difficult decisions
« Reply #12 on: August 08, 2017, 06:25:58 pm »
Ex-BH and I often didn't see things the same, but then I'm a Smallholder and he's a commercial farmer.  So we both had to make allowances for that. 

We had the luxury of each having our own stock, so I'd be head decision maker about mine and he about his, but we would still discuss and listen to each other's advice.  Not necessarily take it, but always give it a hearing.

My own priorities became pretty clear to me, and help me to make decisions.

1.  I need to be fit and well to look after them all, so anyone dangerous has to go.
2.  I can't bear to have animals I can't look after properly, so anything very time consuming or overly physical means I can't keep that one.
3.  No animal should be other than healthy and happy.  However cute, or lovely its fleece.
4.  Don't breed problems.

I don't know if a couple would find it useful to make such a list each, and maybe then try to combine their lists?  Might help.
Don't listen to the money men - they know the price of everything and the value of nothing

Live in a cohousing community with small farm for our own use.  Dairy cows (rearing their own calves for beef), pigs, sheep for meat and fleece, ducks and hens for eggs, veg and fruit growing

waterbuffalofarmer

  • Joined Apr 2014
  • Mid Wales
  • Owner of 61 Mediterranean water buffaloes
Re: Making difficult decisions
« Reply #13 on: August 08, 2017, 07:19:21 pm »
Oh, WBF ..... Please edit quickly. :roflanim:
Ohhh :o  :roflanim: :roflanim: :roflanim:
Just edited now, sorry bout that ;)
« Last Edit: August 08, 2017, 07:41:22 pm by waterbuffalofarmer »
the most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, loving concern.

Womble

  • Joined Mar 2009
  • Stirlingshire, Central Scotland
Re: Making difficult decisions
« Reply #14 on: August 08, 2017, 08:07:25 pm »
The solution is staring you right in the face, my head'll be bitten off for this one... Assert your manly authority

LOL, Yes, I probably should insert  ;) my manly authority WBF, but I value consensus and teamwork too highly to lose that (and potentially far more  :o ) by simply over-ruling Mrs Womble.

I have to say, though I'm not surprised to hear that opinion voiced, I'm surprised that it was by you, [member=42855]waterbuffalofarmer[/member] , being a young lady and all. A genuine question then: how do you think you would you feel if your husband / wife / significant other asserted their (manly?) authority over you? Do you think you'd respond well, or would you hit them over the head with a rolling pin, as Mrs Womble would most likely do to me?  ;D

I've decided my negotiating strategy though; if Mrs W will agree to get rid of Dinky and Bramble, I will consent to buying two more productive ewes to replace them. OK, that could lead to overstocking eventually, but if I manage to buy some old dears who only have a couple of years left, it could be a good compromise.

Sally, you're absolutely right; having written objectives and priorities would definitely help to guide us here. We'll have a chat about it, since if we really do want different things from the smallholding then we can adapt our plans accordingly, to keep both of us happy as much as possible.
"All fungi are edible. Some fungi are only edible once." -Terry Pratchett

 

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