[egglady]

I'm not really sure what you are angry and upset at? Is it cos the cat gets fed twice? Is it cos the woman wouldn't listen to you and do as you said? Whats the problem here?

Re homing a cat because he goes to be fed somewhere else seems a bit harsh. Just let the cat and that woman get on with it.

good questions..i am angry and upset NOT becuase the cat gets fed twice as he isnt overweight, NOT because she wont do as i asked, but BECAUSE she says she doesnt want him, wont stop feeding him but wants me to stop him going to hers!  so how on earth am i meant to be doing that if she keep making him welcome?

if he wants 2 homes then there isnt much i can do about it - but i do object to being told that the reason he left in the first place was cos we didnt feed him well enough and he was hungry!  there is ALWAYS food in their bowls (and not cheap cr@p either) and his brother doesnt go wandering.

and to your point Jackie, i CAN'T just let them 'get on with it' cos she says she doesnt want him!!!!  (but her actions suggest otherwise to me)

i dont want to send her letters/argue/fight over the cat..i just want a peaceful life

does that make sense and does that explain my frustration?

[Rosemary]

Go and talk to her, face to face, without losing the rag or getting upset. Or try your local Council - they may have a team of mediators who can help. Our local Council has a CALM team (which stands for something but I can't remember what) that mediates in neighbourhood disputes.

[Jackie]

' From "Daily Mail" 8th October, 1946: It was held by Judge Crosthwaite at Liverpool County Court that the cat has a right to prowl.

J. E. Withers tenant of a ground floor flat in St. George’s Road, Hightown, Liverpool, sought an injunction against her tenant of the flat above, to keep the cat under control and claimed damages. For Mrs. C.’s cat, it was said, got into Mrs. W. ‘s, fiat ate mincepies and fish, got on to a bed, and scratched the bedpost. For the plaintiff it was contended that a cat was in the same category as a dog, and it was the owner’s duty to keep it under control. For Mrs. C. it was argued that an owner was not liable for a cat’s actions "when trespassing and following its natural propensities." Judgement was given for Mrs. C. with costs. '

The point of the above quoted article is that it is up to HER to keep the cat out and not for YOU to stop it visiting as cats have a RIGHT to prowl.

Thats now a law.

I would send her a letter dumping the problem in her lap by saying that you CANNOT be held responsible if your cat visits her house as she continues to feed it and that you do not want any further contact about this matter or you will class it as harrassment.

Then forget the whole thing and just let the cat do as he wishes. 

[egglady]

Jackie, that is really helpful - thank you.  i so love this forum!

[knightquest]

My initial response was to clean her windows with a brick but on reflection, Jackies' answer was better! 

[Wizard]

I don't know what you are mucking about at.Throw a bucket of water over it, it won't come back for round two.Drench it with the garden hose.Get the bloody thing wet through cats and water don't mix.

[Jackie]

"You are very welcome Egglady." She says as she courtesy's. 

[valr]

One of my cats is a huge chunker. She is so fat she can hardly jump the fence. It is because she is being fed somewhere else, I am sure! She has these huge dark eyes (like Puss in Boots in Shrek when he is doing the heart-melting thing) and I daresay someone thinks they are being kind to her. However last time I had her at the vet I was told she had to slim down! My other two are trim and fit and I am sure the reason is they don't eat at a neighbours. I am careful not to overfeed them all.
I am going to put a collar on with with a message saying "please do not feed me". If I knew which neighbour was responsible though, I would take the route advocated by Wizard and ask them to douse her with water a couple of times to discourage her! It wouldnt do her any harm at this time of year and I am sure it would do the trick.

Remember - "Dogs have owners, cats have servants"! They are very self-serving but that is one reason I love them.

[egglady]

there was me in the kitchen this morning looking like I'd been dragged through a couple of hedges - hubby's dressing gown on and a box of cheerios in my hand ..when the door bell rang......guess who?  yup...HER and my cat.  he came rushing in to have his breakfast and she said "I'm sorry i went off on one the other day".  so we talked - like grown ups !! she said she hadnt fed him since i spoke to her the other day and hadnt let him in either.  she also asked if i'd phone her next time he wanders so she knows to shut her windows......

looks like the 'lecture' worked after all.....AND i spent about an hour yesterday writing a rather brilliant, if you dont mind me saying, letter which i was planning to post to her today!!!

thanks you guys for reminding me that i was sane after all.....well kind of!

[jameslindsay]

Result, well done Laura

[Rosemary]

Thank heavens someone behaved like a grown up and you hadn't sent the "brilliant" letter. It astounded me how aggressive some of these posts were.

[egglady]

Thank heavens someone behaved like a grown up and you hadn't sent the "brilliant" letter. It astounded me how aggressive some of these posts were.

rosemary the letter wasnt horrible, it just stated what i was asking her to do and why i was asking her to do it.  i think we were both grown up - well me mostly of course!!!

[belgianblue]

well at least you know where the cat is. chill.

[Daisys Mum]

Thank heavens someone behaved like a grown up and you hadn't sent the "brilliant" letter. It astounded me how aggressive some of these posts were.

I don't think any of the replys were particularly aggressive, most of what was said was just to give Laura some moral support, at the end of the day the cat did belong to her and no one has a right to take over someone elses animal, had it been a horse or a dog would you still advocate sitting back and letting the animal decide where it wanted to be

[jameslindsay]

Thank heavens someone behaved like a grown up and you hadn't sent the "brilliant" letter. It astounded me how aggressive some of these posts were.

I don't think any of the replys were particularly aggressive, most of what was said was just to give Laura some moral support, at the end of the day the cat did belong to her and no one has a right to take over someone elses animal, had it been a horse or a dog would you still advocate sitting back and letting the animal decide where it wanted to be

Well said!