[WinslowPorker]

Well all here we are and after months of silly questions my first 4 pigs have gone to slaughter this morning!

feelings: not sure to be honest i know i am a little quiet sat in the office, but not upset or feel bad about anything because we always new that the pigs were purely for meat production, but it does feel a little weird.

At the abbatoirs there were a couple of farmers dropping of pigs who typical pink things but no where near the size of ours and i just hope they had a nice life like ours but i doubt it. however he also put a piglet in that was about the size of a large jack russel which again i found difficult to see especially when it escaped and was caught squealing and squealing! shame really but is uppose if he is pig farmer he may of quickly been able to see that it was not going to catch up ar ending not being commercially viable?
perhaps i am just being soppy but any feedback to settle my mind would be great.

On a positive note..................... Pork & Sausages tomorrow 

[dixie]

Yes it does feel a little strange, but like you say they had a good life, a life that was there for this purpose. When you get it back all bagged and labelled its really exciting, looking how much fat there is, how meaty it all looks, the proof is in the eating though, you wont regret it! Well done!

[JulieS]

What you are feeling is very natural.  Look forward to that fantastic pork!!

I wouldn't say what you are feeling is soppy at all.  It shows you care and that's why your pigs had such a good life.....and will make fantastic pork.

Personally I wouldn't say it gets any easier each time you take some, but the first time was definitely the worse for me.  I think it was because I didn't know what to expect.

[dixie]

Me too, I thought the abattoir would be smelly, noisy and scary, it wasnt!! my pigs were sound asleep in the trailer we had to wake them up!! it was just like taking them to another farm! they strolled off the trailer into the pen quite happily! I still feel a bit sad each time I take them, it does get easier though, once you know what to expect. I took a bottle fed runt, once he was up to weight, I thought that would be hard but it was ok! As long as you stay focused and not let your heart rule your head.........................................

[WinslowPorker]

Thanks guys, still seem a little quiet at the moment but then it is all quite a lot to take in i suppose and going to feed the last 3 tonight will probably seem very strange as well.

The abbatoir was actually a really nice atmosphere, yes there were a couple of commercial producers but probably half a dozen people like us with the trailers having different animal all going fo the same, in a way i suppose it is quite exciting as well because we are now coming full circle. The was a trailer load of commercial pigs and they came out a lot smaller than ours and i looked and couldnt see any evidence of mud wallows or even being outside and were herded in not the most dignified manner, but then that is the reality i suppose, all of us fellow private producers would quiet looking at the animal go off but quite happy that we had all done a good job and given them a far better life than ending up with a commercial producer, i suppose that is what the forever lasting feeling of satisfaction will come from?

looking forward to picking up the pigs tomorrow, just so i can see the meat/fat etc and really gain some appreciation of if we got the feed levels right etc etc . 

[doganjo]

I have a great deal of respect for you, WP.  Pork is not my favourite meat as a roast, but I love bacon, sausages and ham.  I fully admit I couldn't do what you have done and admire you for it.  I have always said I can't eat my own animals but I'm quite happy to eat other people's ones.  Your quietness /sadness is natural and understandable but I doubt if the commercial farmers are feeling as you are right now.

[WinslowPorker]

I know the whole planet seems to always be thinking of the money and fully appreaciate that the farmers are all quite happy because that is there livelihood, i thikn for us its more than that and the happiness of the animal and trying to recreate its natural envrionment  for the ultimatley short life they will have is so important. i am sure in a couple of days i will be fine, but perhaps when the last 3 go it may be even more difficult because that will be final........ well until next year when we do them again.

The thing that 'bothers' me was seeing that little piglet go in, it was so tiny and had had no life. but then perhaps i am only one side of the story and if it was 'not commercially viable' for the farmer then perhaps that is the humane thing to do?? i dont know, but it has caused a fair amount of confusion in my mind to the extent i will probably ask them tomorrow. not out of ignornace but because i have no understanding - or do some things not have an explanation??

today i feel is reflection day

[Hilarysmum]

The piglet was probably going for suckling pig.  At least it would have been dispatched humanely.  Its the down side of rearing your own, you see how the "other half have lived".  Comfort yourself that the pork you will be eating has had  a decent life, and for every kilo you sell/donate/barter to anyone else is 1 kilo that wont have come from a commercial pig whose 'life' if it can be called that - has been miserable and short.  Even so far, far better than the ones from Holland that get turned into bacon or those dragged through the misery of the Eastern parts of Europe. 

You have given your pigs the best of lives, a humane and dignified end.  A good life free from pain, stress and hunger what more could they ask.  Now you need to use and enjoy every piece of the meat out of respect for them.

Enjoy -   you've done a great job.   

[WinslowPorker]

Thanks HM, dont get me wrong i never wore rose tinted glasses when this started and to be honest i am not upset, i just suppose it is the final act and it does make you reflect but i am sure it will be a little easier when the next ones go because we know what to expect and there is no surprises with 'wonder what the abbatoir is like' 'wonder if the pigs are going to get in the trailer ok?' etc

But yes the savouring moment was when we saw the 'commercial' (if thats the right description) pigs come out and they were all pink and quite flabby/soft fleshed. then ours came out with mud on them where they had been in the wallow and were nice and firm and had a good shape, and you sort of thikn well as best as possible we have created a nice piggy environment similar to their instictive habitat and they have run free, wallowed, foraged and dug holes!! and eaten lots of nice treats, where these other ones in all intents and purposes looked in showroom condition as if the have never seem any mud! s

so yes very satisfied, still recommend keeping pigs and man alive am i looking forward to eating some nice pork and sausages!! 

[dixie]

The others would have been kept inside, with no fat on them and thin skin, so no crackling! you wait til you try the crackling on yours, it will be divine!!

[WinslowPorker]

Salivating already

[egglady]

WP, our two are going to the abbatoir tomorrow so i totally know how you feel.  it is such a bag of mixed feeling right enough - and not helped by the fact that we were told not to feed our boys tonight so every time they saw us they came squealing and looking for their dinner.  poor fellas.

but i was reading HFW's meat book tonight and it really put the whole thing into persepctive for me and i think i will never buy commerical pork/sausages, etc, etc ever again.  every pig we rear and take to meat ourselves, is one pig not doomed to a very inhumane existence.

[Helencus]

Can't you give them anything? Seems like they should have a last meal..

[egglady]

Can't you give them anything? Seems like they should have a last meal..

they can still dig and find food so that should help.  plus we've decided that they deserve a light breakfast tomorrow as a sort of 'thankyou', both for loading into the trailer and also for feeding us....hopefully the abbatoir people wont be too cross with us

[Helencus]

I hope so too :-) hope all goes smoothly for you