[Luce747]

I need to discuss this, even though it is a bit of a sensitive issue!
Does anybody else struggle with keeping house when you have lots of animals and children??
 
I have a pony, goats, pigs, lots of rabbits & poultry, an owl, a dog and we raise about 60 chicks at any one time.
My house is a bit shabby and unkempt. I would not even go so far as to say it is very clean.
We are not overly houseproud and both struggle like hell to keep the house presentable.
 
It is now becoming an upsetting issue because our 5 year old is starting to get comments. A friend came to play a couple of times and said that our house smells. This morning another one of his friends said very loudly 'my house is clean, your house is dirty! you have to clean the whole house!'
I could have died and have come away very upset about it.
 
Someone told me that people have to take us as they find us and if they don't like it, don't come. The trouble is, I cannot bear the thought of my son being thought of as dirty or getting a reputation for having a dirty house.
 
He is always immaculately turned out for school. It is not us as people - it is our house that we have had comments about.
 
I keep looking around my house and wondering why it doesn't look dirty to me. Thats the scary part! It might be dusty in places and there might be a cobweb or two, but I just cannot see what they are seeing.
 
Have I lived with animals for so long that I am oblivious to dirt???!!!

[plumseverywhere]

Oh Luce no, this worries me too. Its a tricky issue     Children just open their mouths and words come out without them thinking but they also say what adults are too scared to. That's not to say your house is dirty!! Just that children are honest and harsh critics.
There might be an animal odour there that you are all immune to having lived in the house but when a new person comes (who quite possibly lives in a sterile, bleached, animal free environment as too many kids do these days!!) then they might pick up on it.
I remember when I was a district nurse, there was one house we had to visit and it was AWFUL. Cluttered, full of cobwebs (they were so bad it was in your hair and everything) mouldy pot plants, mouldy coffee cups - you name it. I think it was a health risk in itself but we used to have to go there and do the lady's dressings, made us want to baulk. - now I don't reckon your house is like that is it?!
If you are really worried, do you have a really good friend who you could ask?
Our house isn't perfect, my husband has OCD so he drives me to distraction with constant tidying (and I mean totally to distraction, every waking minute) but I make sure the kitchen and bathroom is clean as a priority then vaccuum as and when it needs it. Dusting (yuk) little as possible.  Like you, my children are clean, uniforms and clothes ironed and their hair is tidy.
Try not to let the comments on the little ones get to you. Once one says it another will jump on the silly bandwagon - its probably just they've never smelt small chicks before, how lucky they are to have your son as a friend as they can actually come and visit all these animals!!
Lisa x

[manian]

well
its not easy...... its all about choice. My place has its moments from being tidy and clean and then being messy with days worth of washing up... I choose to look after my animals and then everything in the house comes later (much later )
the main thing is not to stress over what others think, although when it affects kids its very difficult.
you said you wonder if its you and whether you can't see the mess- take photos and look through different eyes
why not just try and keep on top of one room. so when kids have friends over
your house probably isn't overly mucky it's the other nerotic mums that are overly spotless- i have friends who bleach everything including the loo everytime  after its used!!
the other kids don't have the same quality in the sense of experiences and also teaching that its the person thats important not the surroundings, all about who has what nowadays
 
 
 

[HelenVF]

I know exactly where you are coming from!  We are the same.  I go other people's houses and wonder how they can keep it so clean but they don't have animals - we have 3 dogs and a cat inside, not to mention all other jobs to do outside so housework does take a backseat.  Our living room carpet is awful and does get me down.  We are going to change it for laminate when we have some spare money.

I do try and keep the downstairs tidier though, especially the kitchen as we have people dropping in when we least expect it.  However, people have seen it in a mess and they will have to take us as they find us.  We have FAR more important things to do than housework lol.

I do try and keep on top of it and I will do, after we have had a blitz, but it eventually starts getting untidy.

Helen

[Fowgill Farm]

If its nice ouside you won't find me inside doing housework, i usually attend to the dusting when OH writes in it 'dust me please'    or i would be mortified if MIL paid a visit (a rare occurrence since i have never produced the requisite grandchildren!). I catch up on my cleaning in winter when its too horrid and dark to be out at this time of year its gets whats known as a quick lick and a promise
Don't take it to heart too much, kids can be spiteful to each other and if your sons friends come from a sanitized housing estate(echo what plums wrote!) with no animals they will wrinkle their noses at animally smells. Next time they mention it ask what they mean chances are they don't know and have only heard their parents gossiping! Might be worth asking your little boy what he thinks, kids can be brutally honest so be prepared! OH is always saying i stink of pigs (i don't think i do) I now have a plug-in air freshner in a socket near the back door as thats where we hang all our working outside gear that mings a bit and it does help. I also if the weathers nice open a couple of windows in the rooms that people might visit and use or leave the back door open for a thro draft. A quick squirt round with 'fabreze' before his little chums arrive will help.
No-body has a perfect house (excet maybe Anthea Turner ) whats one persons shabby chic is anothers slum and what one persons sanitized white perfection is to them is anothers idea of hell.
HTH
Mandy 
 

[FiB]

FULLY empathise!!! I agree with the 'Kitchen, Bathroom and one tidy room idea' ( I think that was the function of the old fashioned 'parlour' that most big farmhouses have)   I always have to have a special tidy and clean if I know anyone is coming, but if I dont get notice... I 'entertain' in the conservatory (tatty, but at least more or less empty)!!!  You have to walk through our kitchen and dining room to get to the living room and the kitchen usually looks worst.   We just do what we can - focus on the amazing aspects of your life (ie entertain the children outside!!!) and I bet they will be fighting to come around!

[jaykay]

I try to make the kitchen and bathroom being clean the priority. Well the surfaces, the kitchen floor stays clean for anything up to an hour after it's been mopped depending on the weather and therefore the state of the dogs' feet.

But I know the place smells of animals. Litter trays, three big dogs, my wellies, the cats who have taken to peeing on the floor, hatching chicks and ducklings, plus sacks of feed and so on. I prefer most of those smells to bleach!

I did have a major de-clutter and sold stuff on eBay which was good. But stuff creeps onto any horizontal surface in the kitchen.......and that's without kids adding to the chaos.

Maybe your son needs the retort 'my house isn't dirty, but it's full of interesting things - yours is just boring' 

FIB - cross posted with you. Yes, I entertain in the conservatory too for the same reasons. And can completely see the sense of a parlour that the family doesn't use so you know is fit to take visitors into  My conservatory and decent living room are upstairs though, so I have to be clear to male visitors that I am not taking them upstairs to the bedroom 

[nic99]

If it something that is bothering you and you really don't have the time (or inclination) to get everything done why not hire a cleaner? They are not very expensive (about £7.50 an hour around here. May be more pricey if you live 'down south') and if they come for just a couple of hours once a week, or even once a fortnight, it will make a huge difference for not much money. At least then you will know that your bathrooms are clean and they can catch up on the hoovering, dusting etc. Well worth the money for peace of mind and stopping your son getting teased at school. Also if they get the bulk of it done, it will then make it easier for you to keep on top of it til they come again.

[Fowgill Farm]

Ps forgot to say that if any man comes on here and posts "whats housework" they will get a smack round the back of the head sent thro the ether of the worldwide web!
My OH does not even know where the hoover is kept
mandy 

[plumseverywhere]

Ps forgot to say that if any man comes on here and posts "whats housework" they will get a smack round the back of the head sent thro the ether of the worldwide web!
My OH does not even know where the hoover is kept
mandy 

Mine is obsessed with the hoover - its almost like if he's run that round then he's "blitzed the house" - a bog brush on the other hand hmmmmmmmmmm, if only. I've actually left a note next to the loo brush explaining that I am not the only person in a house of 7 people who is allowed to use it!!
I can almost predict which of the men will be on here to have a little wind up - quite looking forward to it 

[kelpy]

i could have written your post myself.
it is hard work trying to juggle housework & animals plus i work part time.
i also had comments like that when my children were younger & it is really mortifying.
my daughter was bullied about it for a while & this was from a child who popped in once to use the loo at a time when we were busy lambing & kidding,so it was messy i would'nt say my house is really dirty just messy.
theres 6 of us living here & my husband & elder son are hoarders.
i would'nt say your oblivious to dirt,just that you have more important things in life to think about 
i've been to immaculate houses & wonder how the hell they manage it.
but they have no animals & live very sterile lives,how sad.
i would talk to your children about it just to see if their worried & i used to keep one room reasonably tidy.
oh & lino instead of carpet makes hell of a difference.
kelly

[omnipeasant]

Okay, don't forget the benefits of having animals and a 'normal' house. Children growing up in the kind of environment you describe are usually healthier, have less allergies and a more rounded personality. I wouldn't feel brow beaten into changing for some jumped up kid who thinks your house is dirty. I bet your son wouldn't be so rude to tell the other mothers that their houses smell of chemicals!! Personally I hate walking into a house that smells of air freshener, prefer real flowers and the smell of puppies.
Be kind to yourself, as others have said keep the kitchen and bathroom clean and prioritise what you can and can't do. Remember, you are more normal than you think.

[Berkshire Boy]

I am a man who is quite happy to do some housework. Friday usually go round the house hoover.mop and a bit of a polish. To be honest there is more to life, if people have a problem with a bit of dust or animal smells tough like it or lump it.
We have friends that have a house that looks like it is a shop display, hate going round there looks like no one has ever walked on the carpets or sat on the sofa, I like my house to look lived in. Dirt is good for you that's what I tell everyone.

[Bramblecot]

I am a man who is quite happy to do some housework. To be honest there is more to life, if people have a problem with a bit of dust or animal smells tough like it or lump it.
We have friends that have a house that looks like it is a shop display, hate going round there looks like no one has ever walked on the carpets or sat on the sofa, I like my house to look lived in. Dirt is good for you that's what I tell everyone.

Ditto from my husband .  He does not worry about it at all - 'people come to see us and if they don't like our house, don't visit!'  I am more concerned but I try my best to keep the downstairs loo clean for visitors and the dining room .  I try and keep them outside mostly though!  A couple came here straight from the allotment (no veg allowed in garden, only flowers) and he said 'It's always so comfortable here because it is a mess '.  At home he is not even allowed indoors in his gardening clothes - normal clothes to me.  My neice did tell me 'you have a lot of dust, Auntie - she was 9 at the time'

[smithycraft]

I sympathise with your predicament, especially when sterile cleanliness seems to be so important these days.  I was amazed when I visited the hospital recently and there was a notice on the door of the x-ray department telling me to use the hand gel before I touched the bell.  Unfortunately I didn't notice it until after my unprotected finger had pressed it!  It makes me wonder how we survived when I was a child.

Our house is covered in dust from our solid fuel range and it highlights the cobwebs quite nicely.  The floors and furniture have a good coating of dog fur and muddy footprints.

If we are expecting visitors we have to start cleaning weeks beforehand.  I'm sure our house reeks of dogs but I can't smell it and if I try one of those air fresheners that pumps out different aromas, it makes me feel sick.

However, I do have some standards - I always do the washing up straight after a meal!

Life's too short for housework.