[Dizzycow]

So, I award myself the Cheif Brat Award. There has been months of preparational whining. Weeks of whingeing. Years of yawningly dull yarking. Eventually, worn to a mere thread, The Wonderful Waddells bravely stepped up to the plate. Many of you know about my rather serious medical condition, and will sympathise. I am tragically struck down with Big Girls' Blouse Disease, and am unable to dispatch the birds, despite your continued encouragement.

The Great Roberto, and his lovely spouse, the Lovely and Lucious Lillian, are owed a huge debt of gratitude. Worn down by my constant whining, they came and dispatched my extra male chooks. I'm eternally grateful, loved spending time with the (slightly mental) Waddells.

You guys, despite your appalling sense of humour, are a total joy. And a Sausage Sensation.  Big hugs from Dunfy. 

[Womble]

Well done Robert and Lillian!  (Well, it saves any of the rest of us having to cross the Forth to commit mass slaughter!  ).

Besides, I may be able to kill a cockerel or two, but I'm never going to be a sausage sensation  .

[chrismahon]

Well to your credit Dizzycow you don't think you can do it and then make a hash of it causing unnecessary suffering. Unusual reason for a social gathering though.

In Storey's Guide to Raising Chickens, a truly comprehensive and useful book for less than £10, they suggest some methods. I would say the most humane and easiest is a .22 pellet into the head. If you do take this route may I suggest a Crossman PCP. This is a cheap (£80) Pre-Charged air Pistol using gas cylinders running at the legal limit of just under 6 ft lbs. Makes an excellent rat/ rabbit despatcher as well.

[Big Light]

Coq au Vin coming up knowing you 

[deepinthewoods]

phew

[lill]

ah yes Vicki slightly mental in a nice way, puts  a new meaning to kicking the bucket  eh.  Your kids are the most gifted kids that we have ever met and a credit to you, glad to be of help to you in you long waited hour of need. I do presume it is a lot quieter at you place now.

[Dizzycow]

Thanks, Lill, for your VERY kind words, and your extremely generous help. You saw what I was like when you guys were doing the deed, what a total pansy. I hope that you really do know how grateful I am to you both. And it is MUCH more peaceful round here!  (ps, there's no kicking coming from the bucket, thank God, so you did your bit very well!)

 The wimpiness can't be helped, and you're right, Chris, getting the experts in was totally the right thing to do, for me as well as for the birds.
In other countries they have large social gatherings to kill and butcher animals. Men doing the slaughter and basic butchering, women doing the finessing. Cameraderie, vino, hard work shared by friends, followed by a feast...... why not? This kind of experience (for me) embodies the great spirit and the practical use of TAS. We had tea, biscuits, a giggle or two, and the unpleasantness was dealt with quickly and professionally. Better to be social about it than solitary and depressed, I reckon!
I'll certainly look into the gun, for rats though. I admit that I'll never be able to dispatch one of my own birds, regretfully.

Big Light, my beautiful RIR was eaten today by my pals, not by me, though. Still queasy at the thought. A delicious skewer of breast with a sticky chinese sauce, everyone was impressed. Poor chap.

DITW 

Don't get too relaxed, Womble......!!!! My Little Black Book Of Handy People is growing, and you're in it!! 

Cheers, dears. 

[robert waddell]

there is no disgrace in being a wimp  i can not watch any animal killed that i have reared  somebody Else's that is different
rats you never mentioned them when i was there that is the only downside to poultry

[plumseverywhere]

Oh Dizzy, I can't do it either! I'd have to call my dad to come all the way from the cotswolds for me!
Robert and Lillian are lovely 

[lill]

yes Robert you can't even give me help to castrate piglets, you leave it to Donna to help me, aye you are a wimp eh,   

[Big Light]

Love the schoolboy irony with plums everywhere before lills comment

[plumseverywhere]

LOL Big Light - I'm being serious! My dad lives some distance from me but I'd have to phone him to help, even as a 39 yr old mum of 4 I'm still a wuss!!

[robert waddell]

testicles and a scalpel just does not square with a man   some can change a crappy nappy others it gives them the boak just the same as the smell of puss it would not do if we were all made the same  and had the same ideas

[NormandyMary]

There is just no way that I could kill one of my chooks. When previous birds have been very poorly, Ive taken them to my neighbour to do the deed, but he's moved away now, so I dont know what Ill do. There are a couple of farmers either side of our property, so I think I'd have to put it in a box and take it to one of them and beg a favour. Im not particularly squeamish, Ive performed surgery on a cockerals foot before now, but to actually kill an animal, NO WAY JOSÉ!

[deepinthewoods]

testicles and a scalpel just does not square with a man   some can change a crappy nappy others it gives them the boak just the same as the smell of puss it would not do if we were all made the same  and had the same ideas

please read the above with care.