I've had four horses on one of the stubble fields in front of the farm for a month or so, and I got a call yesterday afternoon from the landlord/farmer to say that the field was to be ploughed soon. He suggested that I move the horses through the next stubble field and into another, where they can stay for wee while.
Knowing that 'soon' could mean within a few hours, I nearly got into a panic as my wife is in hospital and my two sons are off school and nursery with a gastric flu-ey thing.
This morning, the tractor turned up in the field and ploughing commenced. Simultaneously, my elder son, who's eight, woke with a high temperature, hallucinating and talking about all the people in the house and his fears for the dog.
The dog was fine, and there was only myself and his little brother there.
The next few hours were spent spongeing him with tepid water and dozing him with calpol and ibuprofen to bring his temperature down. My younger son (3) developed a hacking cough overnight, discovered at 03.30 am when he awoke and thought it was morning, and I felt like death warmed up.
Meanwhile, the tractor and five furrow plough droned on to remind me that I had to find a way to move the horses.
After lunchtime (but no lunch), a friend and near neighbour called in for news of my wife, asking if there was anything she could do to help. I gave her a cup of tea and, stupidly, let her go without asking for the help I now desperately needed, thinking I'd shift the horses later when another friend could look after the bairns. By then, though, it would be dark.
By the time I saw her away, my younger had fallen asleep on the settee and the elder was feeling and looking much better, and was playing his Wii. In desperation, I said I was nipping out to take down two short runs of electric fencing on another stubble, within site of the house, some of which fencing I'd need for the planned move of the horses, and wouldn't be long.
Off I set in my wee 4 wheel drive motor, to the far end of the field, intending to lift the far fence, then the nearer, a job which should have taken about twenty minutes...except I got the truck bellied in a wet bit.
In a panic now, with over half the horses' field ploughed, and the horses milling around on the endrig at the opposite end to that which was handiest to get them shifted, I quickly dropped the first fence before setting off at a heart attack-inducing trot for the house and my boys, making a phone call to my nearest neighbour as I went. Luckily, the first call was successful and my neighbour's son said he'd come right away to pull me out.
So I found myself trotting back along the field to my rendezvous point whilst making another call to the neighbour from whom I'd declined help earlier. She very kindly said she'd go and take care of the kids for me.
Neighbour's son and huge tractor hauled my car out of the hole and set me back on firm ground and I headed home, thinking the plan to move the horses in the dark was probably going to be my best bet now. However, as I came down the road, I saw eejit girl from the village, who rides other peoples' horses hatless, hi-viz-less, and who can't be told anything about anything, riding her new horse up the field on the other side of the fence from my horses. Of course, mine were following her on their side of the fence. The tractor and plough were on their way to the same corner of the field as eejit and my horses were heading for and, with only one electrified rope between the present situation and mayhem, I had to think fast.
A quick call to my neighbour/babysitter confirmed that she had no schedule to keep and I might as well move the horses while I was out, so I fired the car in the field gate and drove quickly down the middle of the field, keeping a wide berth of eejit girl. She was almost at the top of the field; the tractor was within 40 yards of her and my lot, and my young filly was already dancing around looking for a way through the fence to meet the new horse.
Suddenly, my mare saw my car, or recognised its peculiar sounds, and switched her attention to my progress down the field. A quick toot of the horn confirmed my identity and drew the attention of the others too. Eejit girl waved. I drove down the field and the horses followed on their side. All the times I'd tooted the horn when arriving to feed them in the winters had paid off.
Once they were all down at the bottom of the field I nipped along to the next field and checked the boundaries. A quick sort here and there and it was time to move them. I nipped back along the bottom of the middle field, asked them to wait while I took down the bit of electric rope from the gap in the hedge,and let them run.
They're pretty switched on, my horses, as they've been moved around as a herd more often than they've been led. Usually, when I shift them about, I leave a bit of feed or a slice of hay each at the new place, so that they get a wee reward on their arrival. Having seen me in the far away field, checking the boundaries, they knew that was where they were to go. When I let them out, they trotted straight through the middle field and into the one I wanted them in. All that remained was for me to close the gate and, this time, they got a fuss and a rub instead of a food reward.
Job done.
I'm now writing this, having fed and watered the wee bairn who has now taken himself off to his own bed tonight (last night he was in mine), saying he loves his daddy and he loves his mummy
...he's such a good wee thing; the elder is looking more normal, sprawled and watching tv
, but hasn't eaten yet.
It's great when everything goes according to plan, isn't it?
Topic: It's great when everything goes according to plan, isn't it? (Read 14879 times)