[Snoopy]

I love Christmas Shopping - but end up buying too much, so this year, I am holding back.

Tara now knows its us and not you know who, so that takes the pressure off, but also the fun away 

Well we did really well to have her believe until she was 10

Shes a good kid and hasnt asked for much - a Nintendo Game and a book, and a DVD.

I have already got her a load of books and wool and crafy stuff, so she's taken care of, never know what to get Joe, he's not into clothes, used to get him animals, but we have far too many, he has all the tools you could wish for, and so its difficult what to get him.

I have a wish list - I would love a Magimix 5200 stainless steel - which is a lot of money, but would help me with my chutneys and bread, would probably be best to wait until they have the January sales or bring out a newer model to get one.

The only other thing I have wanted for years, is a Kopykake Kobra Artists Projector, which again is a lot of money, but would help me to concentrate on colours and paintings instead of getting the basic drawings down, which would speed up my work, but, again I have lived without it for years, so do I really need it???

I give my family and friends home made jams and chutneys, or a Christmas Ham or meat hamper, which is great for me and for them too.

Just made a big batch of Christmas Chutney to go with cheese and ham buffets, and Onion Chutney too. 

We will have a nice quiet Christmas this year, and we will need the break as December is a mad month business wise for us.

Looking forward to trimming up the tree etc.

[little blue]

..... Got home from work to find the husband on the phone...
Turned out he'd ordered my Christmas present from a well known catalogue and they'd sent a lovely glow in the dark, silent tick alarm clock.

But... my brand new (in the sale!)  Sat-Nav was nowhere to be seen!  So cos I can get lost in my own back yard, I'll be going nowhere far til they find it!    I mean... wheres the similarity?!  Tick tock, follow the road ahead for 3 miles!          As a 'new' driver (ie not long passed) I have enough to think about without having to remember where to turn left or... whats the other one?... right?!

[doganjo]

Ok, now you know what you are getting for Christmas but do you know how to use it?   You have to pass a test for that too, you know. 
 1. You must learn how to totally ignore what tomtom says because you know exactly where you are going, and that can't possibly be the right way
 2. You must learn how to shout at tomtom because there is NO WAY that can be the right way to turn
 3. You must learn to swear at tomtom because the effing thing has gone dead.
 4. You must learn that he needs to be plugged into the cigarette lighter socket all the time or it runs out of juice
 5. You must learn that 'in 400 yards turn right' means in 400 yards, NOT at the next turn off 15 yards away
 6. You must learn that sometimes he needs his maps updating and that costs £40 a time
 7. You must learn that it's a waste of time updating the maps because it's only London that's ever updated anyway.
 8. You must learn that sometimes tomtom take you across rivers and down dark country lanes.
 9. You must learn to sometimes believe tomtom implicitly
10. You must learn that tomtom is not human and is totally deaf

Bat all in all you must trust tomtom to always get you home - no matter how long it takes him to do it.

I love mine to bits, would never have got to the places I've seen without it, and wouldn't be without it, and always feel safe that it will get me home from wherever I am, and I'll never get lost again.
HAve fun! .

[Snoopy]

..... Got home from work to find the husband on the phone...
Turned out he'd ordered my Christmas present from a well known catalogue and they'd sent a lovely glow in the dark, silent tick alarm clock.

But... my brand new (in the sale!)  Sat-Nav was nowhere to be seen!  So cos I can get lost in my own back yard, I'll be going nowhere far til they find it!    I mean... wheres the similarity?!  Tick tock, follow the road ahead for 3 miles!          As a 'new' driver (ie not long passed) I have enough to think about without having to remember where to turn left or... whats the other one?... right?!

LOVE your sense of humour - hope your sat nav turns up soon 

[Snoopy]

Ok, now you know what you are getting for Christmas but do you know how to use it?   You have to pass a test for that too, you know. 
 1. You must learn how to totally ignore what tomtom says because you know exactly where you are going, and that can't possibly be the right way
 2. You must learn how to shout at tomtom because there is NO WAY that can be the right way to turn
 3. You must learn to swear at tomtom because the effing thing has gone dead.
 4. You must learn that he needs to be plugged into the cigarette lighter socket all the time or it runs out of juice
 5. You must learn that 'in 400 yards turn right' means in 400 yards, NOT at the next turn off 15 yards away
 6. You must learn that sometimes he needs his maps updating and that costs £40 a time
 7. You must learn that it's a waste of time updating the maps because it's only London that's ever updated anyway.
 8. You must learn that sometimes tomtom take you across rivers and down dark country lanes.
 9. You must learn to sometimes believe tomtom implicitly
10. You must learn that tomtom is not human and is totally deaf

Bat all in all you must trust tomtom to always get you home - no matter how long it takes him to do it.

I love mine to bits, would never have got to the places I've seen without it, and wouldn't be without it, and always feel safe that it will get me home from wherever I am, and I'll never get lost again.
HAve fun! .

YOU MEAN ITS NO GOOD CHANGING MY GARMIN WITH THE LOVELY SAMANTHA GETTING ME LOST FOR A TOM TOM THEN 

We call her Samantha because we feel that she is a dumb blonde - and may also be a big tit as she makes a lot of boobies 

We were once up north in the middle of the country, and she told us to go left twice, then said - IMPOSSIBLE, IMPOSSIBLE, Turn around.

AND YES Irish Map Updates are a long way down the list too  
 

But instead of arguing with your passenger, or yourself and the map - you can shout at TOM or SAMANTHA 

Great for getting rid of all that pent up anger from being justled around in the shops at Christmas.

[Sylvia]

Where have they hidden you, Child of the manger
Child of my childhood and Seal of my soul?
They have wrapped me in tinsel
And sold me at counters,
Tuning My song to the ring of their tills.
Sing high with the holly and low with the berry,
All will be gathered around my green tree.

Where will I find you then Child of the manger,
Child of my childhood and Seal of my soul?
You will find me, as ever,
With blind and with beggar,
The lame and the prisoner,
The broken in heart.
At home with the homeless
I dine with the outcast,
And if you receive him then there shall I be.
Sing high with the holly
And low with the berry,
All will be gathered around My green tree.

I want a smallholding outside the door instead of driving six miles there and back in a dodgy old Landrover. I want an all singing ,all dancing, state of the art, incubator. I want lots of fencing, a new Rayburn and all sorts of other greedy things.
I do try though to count my many blessings and think of the above poem instead of the fact that the starter motor has gone on the Landy after an engine re-build, new drive-shafts, a thingy box on the gears etc. And how many people would swap their problems for mine!!!

[Sylvia]

I think sat. navs. are the best invention of all time!!

[Snoopy]

Thanks for the poem Sylvia 

One of my favourite books is Sophies World by Jostein Gaarder.

Is other books - The Christmas Mystery - is very good and similar to the poem, the opening pages are classic! Its about the jingling of tills rather than bells and has a great take on our Christmasses, it reads like an advent calendat - very appropriate for this time of year and might even be in your libraries.   

I also enjoyed his book " Through a Glass, Darkly"  It is about a little girl dying of Cancer, and an Angel visits her
in bed, and they have conversations, the angel tells her that humans view of things is like looking through a glass,
Darkly.

A brilliant book - all three are really good.   

[little blue]

Thanks for the positives of Sat-nav ladies!  It was absolutely not-in-a-million years my idea, but I can appreciate my husband's concerns at letting me out on my own in the car!  So Tom, or Samantha, or whoever will be good company (though who'd trust a Sat nav that cant even get to my house in the first place!!)

[Snoopy]

( though who would trust a sat nav that cannot get to my house in the first place )

 

VERY GOOD POINT

 

LOVE IT 

[doganjo]

Mine doesn't get me right home either - that's not because of the satnav, it's because of how the Post Code system works.  But tomtom gets me close enough to see across the bridge to my house    You'll wonder how you managed without it soon.

[MiriMaran]

Sorry guys, but its only paper maps for me.  Can't stand Satnavs as I can't make myself trust them!  I'm a Luddite when it comes to certain technology!

[little blue]

I'm not that good with paper maps either......


(no hope for me really is there?!)

[marigold]

Ok I have to come clean, I really really really want an incubator..........

[little blue]

Me too!  Intended to use piglet/goat kid sale money but dont think I can wait that long...
Already decided which one I'm having