[Fowgill Farm]

see http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-20936420
 
Why does it seem these days that the authorites have to do everything for some parents......so much so they can't even give their kids some breakfast!
 
My niece is a school teacher and at her school in a deprived area they do this and they have had to stop parents dropping off and collecting their kids in their pyjamas!!
grr grr...if i can feed my animals they can darn well feed their kids instead of having a new i-phone or sky movies!
Or is it just me?
Mandy

[doganjo]

No, Mandy, it's not just you.  My kids are over 40 and they NEVER left the house without a good breakfast - on MY time, and from our own money.  My husband worked fro teh NHS so wasn't well paid and I stayed at home with the kids - we MADE ends meet!

Another gripe of mine is women going straight back to work after their babies are born, handing them on to childminders, and coming back to work in a brand new car.  What's that all about?  Why not stay at home with them and enjoy their childhood and have a second hand car instead - I did and my kids never suffered for being in a 6 year old car.

There's far too much of the  'I want it all, and I want it now' ethos these days!

No offence to anyone just my homely opinion.

[Rosemary]

It's not just you Mandy, but unfortunately, it's a fact of our society. And if the authorities do nothing, it's the kids that suffer.

When I worked for Clackmannanshire Council, we introduced a breakfast service in our most deprived schools and I think it is in all primary schools now. It was free to kids on free school meals but we charged parents if they were not. Teachers felt it had a positive impact on attendance, punctuality and performance - hard to concentrate if your belly's rumbling 

No, authorities shouldn't have to do it - parents should take responsibility for their children and in an ideal world they would (as all animal owners would care properly for their animals) but it's not a perfect world and unless we stop those incapable or unwilling to properly execute their responsibilities as parents, then society as a whole will have to pick up the pieces.

Yes, I'm sure some are just irresponsible and have an iPad and whatever, but a lot are just sad, hapless folk, many with poor mental health and struggling to cope. And some are just poor or have fallen on hard times.

[Bionic]

Mandy I don't have kids so perhaps my views are a bit one sided but I feel that, like animals, if you choose to have them then it is your responsibility to make sure that they are fed, watered and clean and dry.
There are of course exceptions to every rule where things go wrong for no reason of your own but in general it should be the parents responsibility to do these things and not the local council. If the parents opt out of the most basic of care the chances are that their kids will grow up thinking this is 'normal' and in all likelihood treat their own children in the same way.

[happygolucky]

I also always made sure ours had breakfast, BUT, I see loads of children going off to school with a bag of crisps and a can of something fizzy, now I know I would love that and I bet they do but their parents or carers should not have them in the house to hand out instead of toast or some cereal, although there is bad press now on most of them!!! There is a snack shop across from us now and loads of parents nip in there for food for thier children, thats still better than the crisp option!
I worked in a School where lads had been chucked out of main stream schools and breakfast for them was a must, I even liked it!!!
As for women going out to work!! that's hard, many cannot manage even basic payments for rent or mortgage and many couples only come out a few pounds better off after the cost of child care.....I was glad that was not an option for me as a young mum, I did however work but took them with me, I worked in a nursery when the oldest was 3.....A good option is extended family looking after young ones, or parents shareing the care, jobs are hard to come by so being choosy is not always an option.
My mum never made breakfast for me but we always ate something, usually toast.
I could rant on but there is too much to say and its complex, children without modern gadgets and reasonable cars get a lot of stick at school usually, its all snowballed with technology and fashion trends.........wages however have in general not gone up, both of us, when I do work are on a lot less now than 5 years ago!! Just glad its not an issue for me as my children are grown up!!

[happygolucky]

I must add, working within social services, many parents who were not stupid, had no idea of what was good to feed a child, I had to stop a couple from putting loads of salt on a baby's chips!!
Some people think things they like are good to give thier children, just because they like them, they think they are then good parents, a bit like animals, I had to laugh at a women telling me she never gave her dog dog food but it had the same meals as she did, even puddings, now thats not right either but, she thought she was being a good carer.
I now places have been set up to educate parents and carers but not sure if its going in or not, extended family has gone in lots of cases, where the children sit and watch granny cook of help mum or dad to cook, too much time trouble and mess for a lot of working parents, I also used to be suprised how many children did not take part in any type of "dirty" play!! see....I told  you I had a lot to say!! I have tons and tons more!

[SteveHants]

I don't think its anything new that children get malnourished.


Mt mother has just retired as a teacher, and started off her career in Salford, where she is from.


She has told me that some kids would have chips from the chippy every night and that was probably the only time they got fed - other than milk and school dinner.


So, it isn't all about 'modern parents', sadly it has been going on since forever - it is just now that we are choosing to feed the kids breakfast, which can only be a good thing.

[Fowgill Farm]

If the parents opt out of the most basic of care the chances are that their kids will grow up thinking this is 'normal' and in all likelihood treat their own children in the same way.

Thats part of the problem...children having children, grandmothers aged 30! its frightening but there are many in society who see having children as their only meal ticket or way of getting money. What has the benefits system created? Benefits were supposed to be a means of getting you by in hard times but now they're a way of life for many, a very vicious circle indeed.
very disturbing.
mandy

[goosepimple]

I know some parents who are well off and don't clothe or feed their kids properly because they're too busy doing their own thing, business or hobby - kids coming out with t shirts in freezing weather etc, they don't get a proper breakfast or evening meal - like they're supposed to look after themselves.  I think its very sad, some parents forget their kids are kids.  And that is from people who can afford to do that but are self preoccupied and forget to. 
 
I can see an argument for giving kids breakfasts in school and it helps them, but it gives the parents even more of an excuse to not take responsibility.  It also makes children more 'affordable' as someone else picks up the tab and that's not good.  There isn't an answer to this.  There might be a lot wrong in society these days but at least we're not in Dickensian times when children starved to death and died from illnesses they shouldn't have.

[Fowgill Farm]

I know some parents who are well off and don't clothe or feed their kids properly because they're too busy doing their own thing, business or hobby - kids coming out with t shirts in freezing weather etc, they don't get a proper breakfast or evening meal - like they're supposed to look after themselves.  I think its very sad, some parents forget their kids are kids.  And that is from people who can afford to do that but are self preoccupied and forget to. 
 

yes i agree that at the other end of the scale some kids seem to be a necessary accessory and suffer because of it.
Guess i was lucky and just had a good upbringing by my parents despite funds been tight we were always fed and warm.
mandy

[Hermit]

Cannot believe it!!!!!! If the teachers notice a child forever hungry they should call social services and see whats going on at home never mind encouragement.In my day you were responsible totally for your child before school start , now teachers and schools are free baby sitters and transport providers. I really do despair at what society is becoming, each generation becoming more dependant on the Government and too lazy to even cook properly. How many parents see their kids off still in their dressing gown giving the impression to the kids they should still be! Or how many actually get up and dressed to give the kids a good impression of routine and starting the day properly. OOh I could rant on.
It is a real shame on the authority that they have come to this, it should have been nipped in the bud at the first signs of neglect.

[SteveHants]

Cannot believe it!!!!!! If the teachers notice a child forever hungry they should call social services and see whats going on at home never mind encouragement.In my day you were responsible totally for your child before school start , now teachers and schools are free baby sitters and transport providers. I really do despair at what society is becoming, each generation becoming more dependant on the Government and too lazy to even cook properly. How many parents see their kids off still in their dressing gown giving the impression to the kids they should still be! Or how many actually get up and dressed to give the kids a good impression of routine and starting the day properly. OOh I could rant on.
It is a real shame on the authority that they have come to this, it should have been nipped in the bud at the first signs of neglect.

I hate to break it to you, but neglect like this has been going on since anyone can remember - I am the first generation of my family to have grown up outside inner Salford (well, with the exception of those that came from Ireland in the 1920s) - My grandparents could tell you similar stories, drunken parents, starving children. And yes, in their day there was less dependency on the state, but then, more children died.

[HelenVF]

I can see both sides to this.  Why shouldn't the parents look after their kids properly.  However, if they aren't, the kids are suffering so a little help, goes a long way.

However, are we making it too easy for them to be lax in their parenting?   I wouldn't dream of sending my son to school without breakfast....although I have forgotten to give it to him in the past (very embarrassed), but it wasn't a school day.

It just seems to easy for some part of society nowadays, to be lazy and disinterested.  I think that attitude needs to change overall.

Helen

[sabrina]

There is another side to this. Parents who have to work just to make ends meet, no choice. they will be glad of the breakfast clubs. Getting kids up early in the morning is hard enough but at least if they are having something at school that is better than nothing at home because they were not up on time. I was lucky that my job fitted around my kids so feeding them before school was never a problem. I had to work as my first husband gambled and often there was no money from him even for the basic things. Now having a family is almost a luxury. Kids are expensive and the days of mum staying at home is almost in the past or childcare makes going out to work like a 2nd mortgage.When I was a child most mothers did not work that is rare now and not because everyone wants too much out of life but due to life being costly. Ask yourself this, could you pay your bills and feed your children on £18.000 a year. I have friends who have to do just that.

[happygolucky]

I think breakfast clubs are a great idea, if parents have to go to work then children are not always ready to eat, later however they are, and at least at a school they can offer good nutrition whereas at home grab something quick can mean empty calories.
Re working mums or dad, Its not always natural to be a good parent at all, so, with nursery, and help re things like Tax credit the child can have a slightly better chance of getting a good start, I know just how expensive a nursery is, I have done nanny work and everything re child care....I must add, just because you are a parent does not make you good.
The last point, like others have said, its not a new thing but it seems more common, as is divorce or split families, and laws of who looks after your child do not always help either.
Maybe soaps and TV programmes are a good way of education parents and people re food, I know they tackle some interesting things and I think more people take notice.
When I worked with disabled family's, support groups offered loads of help re child care and so did parenting classes...not a bad idea....Oh and I forgot, anyone who rings social services with a concern will have it investigated, I know as I have taken my turn on the phones, anyway, most of the complaints will be sorted quickly and the child kept an eye on, But, there are so so many children at risk, priority is getting to the more serious cases of neglect and abuse and like everything else, there are not the funds!!