[in the hills]

   Welcome back and sorry for your loss 

[Lesley Silvester]

So sorry to hear of your loss and wish I could say something to make it hurt less.       It will take time and I don't think you ever get over such a major loss.  You just learn to live without the person you love.  Meanwhile, as others have said, don't rush into making any decisions.  It's far too soon.  Give yourself a year or more, then do what feels right for you.   

[Mel]

Thank you everyone for your kind words.

I am already going through the phone syndrome,must speak to Mum about it,all of this happened so quickly,over two months.  Mum seemed to go downhill rapidly after chemo and radiotherapy,it was really shocking the severity of the treatment.Earlier in the year,people would say-your Mum looks very young for her age.

After the first treatment,she looked like a really frail elderly lady,such a drastic change,*sigh*,I have been reading the e-mails and listening to the answer phone messages.Makes you see that life is precious,being here and gone in a flash,just like that.

My Gran passed away earlier this year too,I think that also had a major effect on Mum,and my real Dad 2 years ago,it is really sad losing everyone in such a short time.

Today is another day,and a nice one,I have chicks just hatched,chicks at 12 and 18 weeks of age,am having a major war against the worst red mite infestation I have ever seen-one the one and only hut I have not creosoted-that stuff does work.The sun is shining and everything is in it's place on the smallholding. Tomatoes have gone rife,I cannot sell them fast enough-two greenhouses full,new potatoes are first class,all my veg has done really well after such a bad start.I just wish I could share it with my parents

Oh,well,I have to tackle the world of weeds today,at least I have all of this to take my mind of off things.Thank heaven I have the smallholding,and it is nice to know I am not alone and have such lovely support from you all.xx

[Lesley Silvester]

The smallholding will help and we are always here for you.  Hope you're having the  that so many of us are getting.  Nothing seems quite so bad when the sun shines.