Author Topic: How to Annoy people  (Read 3940 times)

Troubled Waters

  • Joined Jun 2009
How to Annoy people
« on: October 06, 2009, 10:50:55 am »
As I leave work on Thurs I have such an urge to do all the office based ones...

1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "TO-GO."
4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."
8. Practice making fax and modem noises.
9. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc" them to your boss.
10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
12. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.
13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
14. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
15. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
16. Staple pages in the middle of the page.
17. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a croaking noise.
18. Honk and wave to strangers. (I love doing this one )
19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.
20. TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
21. type only in lowercase.
22. dont use any punctuation either
23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times.
"DO YOU HEAR THAT?"
"What?"
"Never mind, it's gone now."
25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
26. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
27. Ask people what gender they are.
28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
30. Sing along at the opera.
31. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
32. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."
AND...... Drum roll
33. (very topical) Develop swine flu, and call 999!

 

sandy

  • Guest
Re: How to Annoy people
« Reply #1 on: October 06, 2009, 03:26:14 pm »
 ;) ;DLove them and may well have a go, I thought about highlighting things in news papers that are completly ordinarly to t get people guessing, or ringing a date on the callender (I used to do  that as a teenager to not give my mum a clue about missed "full stops" ;) if any! Another thing is to wisper about nothing in company of someone that ignors you and drop thier first name in quietly!!!!!! Off to think up some to do ??? I would love to change size lables in shops to get my own back, I'm sure someone put's the thin sizes on t he fat clothes...or is it just me getting bigger????/
« Last Edit: October 06, 2009, 03:29:14 pm by sandy »

Snoopy

  • Joined Aug 2009
Re: How to Annoy people
« Reply #2 on: October 06, 2009, 05:50:07 pm »
oooh  your two rebels you... :o
Tell me more - this sounds fun
 ;D ;D ;D
Living the Good Life and spreading the word

doganjo

  • Joined Aug 2012
  • Clackmannanshire
  • Qui? Moi?
Re: How to Annoy people
« Reply #3 on: October 06, 2009, 07:06:44 pm »
In a previous job the MD's wife (Company sec) took a grudge against me, I could do nothing right for months.  I eventually got fed up with it, found another job, worked out how much annual leave and accumulated hours were due to me, worked out the net figure I was due in pay, they were down South at their other company so I sent them a fax at 12 noon with my resignation letter giving them - one hours' notice!  I had previously spent the morning writing detailed notes for my staff so that they wouldn't be disadvantaged work wise, handed the car keys to their son and walked out - into my delighted husband's waiting arms!
Always have been, always will be, a WYSIWYG - black is black, white is white - no grey in my life! But I'm mellowing in my old age

sandy

  • Guest
Re: How to Annoy people
« Reply #4 on: October 06, 2009, 08:07:01 pm »
I once, when I worked at an  upper School (ages 15+) I had been making a birthday card for a student with MS and accidently left his cut out face on the photo copier, needless to say, the next run of some 100 odd documents all had the students face in the courner....everyone found it very funny!!!!

 

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