The Accidental Smallholder Forum
Community => Coffee Lounge => Topic started by: Wizard on June 14, 2010, 05:42:31 pm
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Here I will start you off
There was a young fellow from Bicester
Who fell in love with a flea trainers sister
Cupids bow loosed its dart
Inthe line of her heart
But she bent down to scratch and it missed her
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Mary had a little watch
she swallowed it one day
Now she's taking Epsom Salts
To pass the time away
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Mary had a little lamb
she also had a bear
Ivve often seen her little lamb
Alas I've never seen her bare
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very funny u had me in stiches then well done ;D
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Mary had a little lamb
It's fleece as white as snow
Where ever Mary went the lamb was sure to go
One day she went i nto a butchers shop
And now it's in a pie
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There was a young girl from Madras
Who had a remarkable ass.
Not rounded and pink, as you'ld probably think,
It was grey, had long ears and ate grass!
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See there are some good ones :D :D :farmer: :wave:
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He stood on the deck in the moonlight
His lip was all of a quiver
he gave a cough and his leg fell of
and floated down the river
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Reminds me of
The boy stood on the burning deck
His pockets full of crackers
One went off with a very loud bang and paralysed both ?
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as he stopped and ogled Sophie Loren
a steam roller ran over Ben
In the hospital They wrote a label Long stay
Put im in Wards Eight - Nine and Ten
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Oh to go down to the sea again
to the lonely sea and the sky,
I left my socks there last summer.
I wonder if the're dry?
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In the middle of the day in the middle of the night
two dead men got up to fight
back to back they faced each other
drew their swords and shot each other
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There was a young girl,name of Thrace
Whose corsets would no longer lace.
Her mother said "Nelly
There's more in your belly
Than ever went in through your face!!"
Sorry, I only know rude ones! ;D
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Come on Sylv Lets ev sum mor ;D ;D ;D :farmer: :wave:
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There was a young lady of Riga
Who smiled as she rode on a tiger
They came back from the ride
With the lady inside
And the smile on the face of the tiger
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Hehehehe this is a good and funny thread. Keep 'em coming! ;D :D ;)
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There was a young man from Calcutta
Who fell in a vat of milk with a splutter
He swam round and round
Till he suddenly found
That the Milk had turned into butter
:farmer: :wave:
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He stood on the bridge in the moonlight
picking his nose like mad
rolled them up in little balls
and flicked them at his dad!
The only other 1 I know is very rude so I wont post it. ::)
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Jackie so was it the same bridge where she stood?
She stood on the bridge at midnight
Pelting snowballs at the moon
She said "Sir I've never had it"
But she spoke to bl y soon
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Just for you Sylvia
Yonder lies our Nelly
lying on the grass
With a trumpet up her arse
Playing God save the King
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No limerick this but I thought I would share it with you please don't forget I DON'T DO RELIGEON
Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
Courage to change the things I am able to change
The wisdom to hide the bodies I mayhave to kill because
They Piss me off :D :farmer:
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An accident strange and uncanny
Befell a respectable granny
She sat on a chair
When her false teeth were there
And bit herself right in the fanny
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This is one of my wife's...
If skirts get any shorter,
Said the fairy to the gnome,
There'd be two more cheeks to powder,
And a lot more hair to comb.
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Grandfather at Waterloo
Fought solidly all the day through
He slashed and he hacked
Through the bodies jam packed
and managed to reach Platform two. Boom Boom