The Accidental Smallholder Forum
Pets & Working Animals => Dogs => Topic started by: Kitchen Cottage on December 28, 2013, 08:24:16 am
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Please bear with me...
Freddie is my sprollie, he is somewhere between 16 and 19
His weight has dropped to 17kg. He is doubly incontinent. He is on metacam but seems to be in perpetual discomfort if not pain. He was previously on previcox (?) but that didn't seem to help, in honestly, I missed a few days. He is very very very unsteady on his back legs, he can't turn round easily, falls over frequently, the kitchen is now a sea of rugs because otherwise his legs splay on the tiles and he is stuck. When I have been at work he has had a few topples from which he can't right himself and I don't know how long he has been stuck when I get home. He has some lumps on his stomach which seem moving so I don't worry about them and he has an abcess on his head (been there for years, the vet says they are a spaniel common feature) which now seems to be spreading.
Some days though, increasingly few, he seems happy and pain free.
I have been struggling with the "quality of life" issue for a year.
I have a vet appointment on 30th. My vet is very pro-life and says Fred can go on until there is a crisis, which he says will be the back legs going altogether.
I am not so sure that is a good test.
I have two rescues here, one of which has unsettled him (the not old, blind, collie who turned out to be a young, sighted GSD type) but I am asking for that foster to be moved....
In my mind, it is time but, do I wait until post foster and Freddie has settled again? It's the fact he seems so uncomfortable most of the time
Advice please.
Sorry to drag this out but I have had him so long and I can't imagine a Freddie free house :'( :'( :'(
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It's a hard call and only one you can make yourself :hug:
If it helps I'm a stern believer in a good quality of life rather than quantity( or length) of life. They should enjoy what time they have and if they cannot do that, as hard as it is, it is our duty and care to let them go.
:bouquet: such an awful situation to be in.
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Mammy shaz is right, you and your dog are unhappy its time to say goodbye :hug:
It hurts like crazy but just think of the lovely life hes had.
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If you were in Freddie's position - what decision would you like to be made about you?
I appreciate that this is somewhat "anthropomorphising" the situation but Freddie is a full family member…...
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I'm not sure of your vets definition of back legs going...to me they sound gone enough for there to be a high risk of him getting stuck until you get there and find him.....not sure it is good to wait until the animal IS suffering. So I would go with your instinct, mind you my OH is of the never PTS mindset so it's a struggle to convince some of that, incl some vets.
If you think it's time, then you wouldn't be wrong. You could wait but it's up to you not vet. Better a month too soon than a day too late.
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Sorry to be brutal but you have to be brave. If it were you what would you want?
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I think maybe the fact that you are asking means that in your own mind the time is right. We all need reassurance that we are doing the right thing. And it wont make any of it any easier, but sadly I think you know its time
If anything is ill but will get better or at least improve then carry on with the treatment But when the outcome is inevitable to delay it probably doesn't help much in the long run
:bouquet: :bouquet: :bouquet: :hug: :hug: :hug: :bouquet: :bouquet: :bouquet:
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I think you probably already know the answer... :hug:
It never gets any easier and that is how it should be.
Do you use Forest vets at Hemnall St? I found them to be very kind and understanding every time I made the difficult decision. :bouquet: :bouquet:
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It has reached the time for you to do this last thing for Freddie, without any more 'shall I, shan't I'. He's miserable and has no reason to stay other than your need not to let go. Having him euthanased is your final gift to him.
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it sounds like it is his time to go now.
iv never had a dog put to sleep so i dread it with mine and can imagine how awful it is. i think it would be easier to tell the vet straight what you want rather ask for their opinion. most vets would accept this professionally and do the deed quickly without more checkups etc.
very hard for you tho :hug:
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:hug: :hug:
nothing to add .... except if and when you make your mind up ring the vet and make an appointment for the deed ...saves discussion at vets...... and a good vet will be ready and take you to a quiet room and give you time.
Also helps to decide before hand whether you want ashes back.
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:hug: :hug:
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Goodness so many doggy issues at the moment :'( :'( :'(
Freddie had blood in his urine today so I took him to the vet and he is on antibiotics. I also told the vet that the metacam wasn't working and I thought he had a poor quality of life.
The vet doesn't listen to me and his view is that "what we want is a crisis, such as the back legs going so we don't need to make a decision", anyway I agreed to give Fred 10 days on the new pain meds and see how that goes. In truth it may be that his discomfort has been caused by a urinary issue, the vet doesn't know what caused the blood but thinks its an infection.
On top of Freddie, I've told the rescue that I can't foster Yellow anymore. :'( :'( :'( :'( I agreed to foster a blind older dog and got a sighted GSD puppy... she is too destructive and suffers massive separation anxiety and she is destroying the place. Also she is bullying the other dogs if they come near me. I am absolutely gutted about Yellow, I have let her down, she now has to go into Kennels which is the very thing she doesn't need..... the rescue have been totally sh1t in dealing with me and I will NEVER foster for them. I have fostered dozens of dogs, all agreed to to take account of the fact I work so mainly older and quiet dogs, I would never have agreed to a GSD puppy.
At the moment I am all dogged out today :'( :'(
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Nothing much to say really just :bouquet: :bouquet: :bouquet: :bouquet: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
And take care of yourself also.
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The vet doesn't listen to me and his view is that "what we want is a crisis, such as the back legs going so we don't need to make a decision",
if you feel it is time to put your dog to sleep then be very clear and firm with your vet. i agree speaking over the phone will be easier (for me anyway) and then arrange a time/home-visit to do the deed.
i know from my experience with english townie vets, some would rather do everything possible to save an animal but there is a limit - both emotional and financial. be firm and clear, or get someone to go with you who can be firm for you.
the alternative is to find a new vet.
If the dog is down whilst you are at work then id be inclined to agree euthansia is the best thing. its is heartbreaking for you though :hug:
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Change your vet.
This last thing that we have to do for our friends is hard enough, without the vet being unsupportive.
I think I am right in saying that human medics swear an oath to preserve life, which makes it very hard for them to assist someone to slip away. Vets tell me that they are so very glad that they do not have to swear that same oath, but rather to prevent suffering, so that makes these decisions easier and enables them to end an animal's suffering.
It sounds as though your vet has difficulty recognising when an animal is suffering and quality of life has gone.
As to your decision - and it is your decision, not the vet's - about Freddie. It sounds as though you know it's time. Frankly, finding my dog stuck on his back when I return home, not knowing how long he's been like that, would be something I couldn't bear to see three times. You need support to tell your vet what needs to happen.
Personally I would ask to see a different vet who will not make this more difficult than it is going to be in any case. If I lived near to you I would offer to come with you for moral support. :bouquet:
Looking back over my life and dogs and cats, I do sometimes wonder whether I made this or that decision a little too swiftly and should have given this dog or that cat another few weeks, another op, whatever. But on the whole I feel it is better to not be looking back at prolonging suffering than to be wondering whether any particular animal could have had another few good days after a 17 year innings.
And one that I do recall was a wonderful cat, who at 16 had a leg amputated with what turned out to be an aggressive tumour at the site of an old injury. He never really recovered from the op but could still purr and want to be with me - but was off his food, barely able to walk, not anywhere near wanting to go out and about, and nothing like his former active larger-than-life self. For weeks I struggled with balancing giving him enough time to recover from the op with worrying about how hard he was clearly finding it all. One day I was sure I couldn't watch him go on like this any longer, and we'd had the histology by then so we knew the tumour was aggressive and therefore secondaries were highly likely. I took him in, and to this day I am positive he knew exactly what was happening and thanked me for giving him peace.
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Speaking from experience with our 15year old collie cross who was incontinent and occasionally had fits which gradually got worse. We knew when it was time after one fit she had as the look on her face said it all - she had had enough. Phoned the vet straight away and took her to be PTS. Brought her home and laid her to rest at the bottom of the garden. That was a hard decision as we were due to go on holiday, dog as well, the following day.
It sounds like the time has come :hug: :bouquet:
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A friend of mine had a dog from me a number of years ago. During play with his heavier older dog he banged his head against a metal barn door. After that he had the occasional fit, and then one day he went into a coma following a fit. Steve's vet had that poor dog on a drip and taking bloods from him for two days before I had to step in and tell him to let him go.
For goodness sake don't wait 10 days just because you agreed this with your vet - and get a second opinion if you feel it is necessary, but from what you say on here my own opinion is that Freddie is now being experimented on by your vet.
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Doganjo is right.
I have made the appointment for 1pm today.
A little piece of me will die today :'( :'( :'( :'(
I am trying not to cry because it will upset the dogs but I am not succeeding :(
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I really think you have made the right decision. It's never easy but you have to put your dog first.
AnnS
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Well done Kitchen Cottage - you're doing the right thing for Freddie. Think back to the good times when he was young and full of beans. :hug:
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Well done sweetie. :bouquet: :hug:
Best of luck, try to hold the tears back until he is gone if you can. We'll be here later if you want to talk.
Bless you for doing this last thing for Freddie :-*
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KG, you know you have made the right decision for you and more importantly for Freddie. :bouquet: :bouquet:
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It is done
I spent the morning stress vomiting and shaking, the dogs knew something was wrong.
I vomited and howled (literally) all the way back from the vet and sobbed for the last hour.
But it is done.
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:hug: Freddie is at peace now :hug:
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Well done and have a good cry as well.
Just remember that he couldn't have lived much longer, and you would have been just as upset and at least he is not suffering any more.
Dogs take such a large part of our hearts. My eyes a filling with tears for you as I type, but not tears for Freddie. He is running freely and happily I am sure.
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:hug: :hug:
Brave. Well done.
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bless you, it must be heartbreaking. he was a good age though :hug:
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Well done and have a good cry as well.
Just remember that he couldn't have lived much longer, and you would have been just as upset and at least he is not suffering any more.
Dogs take such a large part of our hearts. My eyes a filling with tears for you as I type, but not tears for Freddie. He is running freely and happily I am sure.
My thoughts too. :hug: . Think of him at peace now, no more pain.
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:hug: :hug: :hug: it was time :bouquet:
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:hug: :bouquet: :love:
Much love xx
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:hug: :hug: :hug: its the hardest and kindest thing we can do for them :hug: :hug: :hug: :bouquet:
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How you doing this morning? Like all others, I feel you made the right decision. Remember the good times, and also let yourself grieve, a dog is as much part of our lives as a human, and will be missed the same way. After all the joy given by Freddie, it is ok to feel grief. You know there is a lot of support for you here, and use it over the next few weeks.
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:bouquet: Its a day that all of us dread...... :hug: :hug: :hug:
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I've only just read this, I understand completely after losing our BC this year, they are such a part of our lives, your boy is at peace now, running pain free with his old friends, all my best wishes to you, :hug: :hug: , it takes time but eventually let another loving soul begin to fill that void,
I think you did the right thing, I know how hard it is, but I'm shocked at the attitude of your vet, I would be worried he was thinking of his fees rather than your boys welfare. - I AM sorry if that is bad timing, but I had to say it. :-\
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Well done it is a very hard decision to make, but at the end of the day they have been a loyal friend and companion it is the last thing you can do for them.
I am sitting here with my thirteen and a half lab, who has been my constant companion and shadow. She has a grade3 mast cell tumour , she has had two lots of surgery and cancer tablets. She is bright in herself but the nature of the condition will make the mass ulcerate which is under her front leg. There is nothing else left to do for her so this will be unfortunately her last week with us, It has been a tough decision to make. It will break my heart but i have to do it for her.
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Eastling, please have someone with you, I am shocked at how deep my reaction was, I vomited all the way home and howled like a wild thing in the car, I still don't know where it came from. When I got home I lay on the sofa for an hour and a half and could not move, I was so drained.
Today I am fine. I took my foster dog Yellow to kennels, she was so sad. I couldn't keep her, I fostered an old, blind, collie sized dog and what arrived was a sighted, puppyish GSD type who developed huge separation anxiety and was very destructive.
I am sure that the rescue will look for a good home with renewed vigour now they are paying kennel fees, but she went so resignedly into a corner.... :(
I am so grateful I have misty, I went out and bought her some chews (which I've had to take away from her because she is attacking Luca as she is toy possessive!
Oh well, onwards and upwards The house seems very quiet and I am washing all of the dog beds and reallocating them. Fortunately there was no particular bed that was Fred's
Thank you for all the support. I am sure the time was right but I will miss him forever xx
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I remember being incredibly upset too, very hard to drive so some support is better if possible, even reading these posts brings back the sadness, however, the cycle of life continues and you are helping dogs so at lest giving back some happiness in your life :wave:
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KC sadly this is not the first time i've had to do this. It never gets any easier, the only slight consolation is that she doesn't know. Hope you feel better soon. I'm sure the rescue will find a nice home.
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:hug: :hug: :hug:
I have had to make the decision so many times KC and it never gets any easier and maybe it shouldn't. Freddie will always be in your heart and I promise that soon you will remember the good times you had together and you are lucky to have your other dogs to care for and they are lucky to have you.
Keep your chin up :bouquet: