The Accidental Smallholder Forum

Community => Coffee Lounge => Topic started by: scattybiker1972 on February 02, 2011, 09:47:36 pm

Title: delicate question.
Post by: scattybiker1972 on February 02, 2011, 09:47:36 pm
i dunno if  this is the sort of place to ask this sort of question/ask advice.......hmmmm. just wondering if anyone has had any similar situation or has the advice..hubbys away at sea,im here on my own...i went to see a client/friend who lost  his wife recently. and i loved his wife she was a really good friend.
he made a pass at me
i feel so sad.
everyones at work or otherwise engaged at the mo,so until tommorrow afternoon i cant really speak to a friend...the ones to give me a good answer anyway
sorry if not appropiate here if it is not  ill delete this post
Title: Re: delicate question.
Post by: Sandy on February 02, 2011, 09:56:39 pm
Your client/friend is feeling very lonely and looking to fill that gap in his life, as you are showing him attention he thinks you are interested, I used to talk a lot to different males etc and they take chatting and caring as being a come on, thats men for you, they take a while to settle into being alone after being in a relationship, they are looking to be looked after but that passes in time for most men.

 Now I suggest that you say how much you want to help but in no way do you want a relationship ( that is unless you do) You will have to be firm and even suggest things he can do to occupy himself and maybe meet some one suitable, make it very clear how happy you are and you do not want those sort of advances, being blunt in a nice way is the only way otherwise  you will string him along and it could get worse.  Good luck
Title: Re: delicate question.
Post by: scattybiker1972 on February 02, 2011, 10:01:50 pm
thank you. i feel better now.didnt know how to deal with this,ususally a quick   >:(   does the trick   but he wasnt really taking the hint,but i couldnt be too hard as i guess hes lonley,probably a bit frustrated and thought..well didnt think .he kopped a handfull as i hugged him.
Title: Re: delicate question.
Post by: Sandy on February 02, 2011, 10:15:44 pm
Quote
.he kopped a handfull as i hugged him
  :o Some one else may have just slapped him!!!!!  ;) No excuse to fondle other peoples bits ;)
Title: Re: delicate question.
Post by: scattybiker1972 on February 02, 2011, 10:18:34 pm
 ;D  i know but i was gobsmacked
Title: Re: delicate question.
Post by: doganjo on February 02, 2011, 10:45:43 pm
That happened to me, and I'm afraid my reaction was to step back very quickly, look him straight in the eye and say 'I'm happy with the man I have, but thank you for the complement.'  He never did it again and we remained friends, and subsequently found another lady who was free to love him.  I most certainly would not have hugged him.
Title: Re: delicate question.
Post by: Frieslandfilly on February 03, 2011, 10:52:53 am
Never had this problem, but I imagine next time you see him, he will be one of two things:
 
1. Embarrassed, in which case accept any apology and suggest he finds a group to join with interests the same as his or something similar

2. Shows no remorse and tries again, in which case give it to him straight (verbally I mean), he can obviously take it,and a slap if necessary!

Sadly if it is the latter he is not the man you thought your friend was married to.